Tag Archives: humour

Have you got what it takes?

We’re hiring! Looking for a few good men  Huzzahnians…

Gorilla Rentals: Now Hiring

Ms. Steak is on the street looking for future Huzzahnians.

The call has gone out and applications for the position of Grade 7 students are pouring  in. Ms. Steak is reviewing each candidate carefully. What do you think–do these applicants have what it takes to be a Grade 7 Huzzahnian?

Some applicants let her know how wonderful they are right away:

  • I would love to apply as a Grade 7 student. I am very amazing and hope I meet your expectations. ~Kaiden
  • I would love to apply for the position of Grade 7 student, just like I did for that unicorn raising job, which was very cool. My friends and family told me I’d do great. (Not really. They just said go to Grade 7.) ~Roxanne
  • I am the best student you’ll ever have (sometimes)…So when I get this job, and I know I will, you will be proud! ~Julia

Many have special talents:

  • I have a great number of eating trophies from the USSR, but sadly I got kicked out for trying to eat the national monument.  ~Kyle
  • If you accept me you will never regret it. I am a genius. I am an awesome cartoonist  and I could make millions if I showed the world my talents. ~Noah
  • One of my qualities is that I am athletic. I play soccer and I make Ronaldo look like he has never touched a soccer ball before. ~Spencer
  • I am also creative and raise unicorns with moustaches in my backyard. Just kidding. See? Creative. ~Adena
  • I am such a fabulous genius. I have created a miniature ferris wheel that can hypnotize anyone, even Superman. ~Tristan

Some have fabulous personalities:

  • I am very easy going so I know, like, legitimately, positively that EVERYONE will like me. I’m not even kidding. Everyone loves me. ~Sophie
  • I am a great role model, and am nice and friendly. I will try my best to work hard and listen. And I have great manners. ~Trevor

A few were making excuses already:

  • I will try my best to listen and work hard but I can’t come to school on all days that end in a Y because I have to make McNuggets at McDonalds. ~Cole
  • You should know that I have very important meetings in NY (New York) and may not get to do homework. ~Chelsey

Some know how to…appeal to Ms. Steak:

  • I would like to, wait, no, LOVE to be a student in your Grade 7 class! It would be an honour. ~Summer
  • You sound like an amazing teacher! I’m very quiet in and out of class and won’t waste your time with stupid questions. ~Melanie
  • All the teachers have said that I have been a very good student and that I listen to the teacher at all times. ~Reece

There were a few perfect students in the pile:

  • I am known as the teacher’s pet. Everyday I will bring and apple for the teacher. NEVER will I be late or miss one day of learning; all my homework will be finished before it is due. ~Kehana
  • I truly believe that I would be a fantastic Grade 7 student because I’m funky fresh and have an extraordinary sense of humour. I also have convinced myself that I have a fabulous voice that I can keep quiet at the right time. ~Josh

Some applicants shared their limitations:

  • I would also like to inform you that my greatest dislike of all is my arch enemy…BROCCOLI (scream). ~Liam
  • My least favourite subject is math because it requires hard work and smartness. ~Bekkam
  • I am amazing at art. It’s just…I have no control over a pencil (I got my mom to write this for me). I have not sense in colour, pictures, or shadowing. But aside from all that, I make a great artist! ~Elysa

Others knew how to wrap it up with a bit of begging:

  • So, Ms. BBQ–I meant Ms. Steak, I hope you will accept me as a great Grade 7 student. ~Monica
  • I hope my good manners, leadership skills, and awesome personality will help you make the right decision for this awesome job! ~Maddy
  • I have just informed you of all the reasons why you should let me into Grade 7. I hope you don’t make a “mistake” and not pick me. ~Becky

Creative Commons image. Link and credit on the image itself.

So the pressure is on. Ms. Steak is finalizing her list of new hires for the 2012 – 2013 team. What do you think? What qualities should she be looking for in her new students? Leave us a comment, we’ll let her know.